Games Congress Plays

If anyone thinks for a second politics is not a game, then they are simply fooling themselves (or, they are simply naive to the entire process). As a Washington, D.C. journalist, I have seen obvious legislation that favor both parties turned into long delays and battling to the last minute for no reason whatsoever but the Republicans and Democrats are two polarized parties that cannot agree on anything.

Now, throw in the Tea Party, something akin to the Nazi Party in 1930s economically stressed Germany. The Tea Party are neither stubborn nor mean--they're just plain crazy. They make Mitch McConnell look like a nice guy. If McConnell thinks they're crazy, imagine what a moderate must think.

But, in politics, Republicans need to play nice with the Tea Party and they did so to the point of painting themselves into a debt-ceiling corner that makes them look foolish. Now what? When we turn to McConnell for his "wisdom," known by most as common sense, then this country has a serious problem. So now, I have to explain how this will all play out in D.C. political theater:

There will be no agreement on the budget and President Obama will get that 14th Amendment going at the last minute--maybe Monday night or Tuesday morning--and raise the debt ceiling. Then, the President can take credit for saving the country and the economic world. Good for him. He played it well because holding the debt ceiling hostage was so stupid that it's easy to make stupid people doing stupid things look stupid. End of story on the debt ceiling.

Now, onto the budget. If this budget does not have $4 trillion in cuts (which is low) it is a complete failure. I would accept $3.7 trillion, but it's still too low. Then, bring in another group of morons who painted themselves into a corner: Standard & Poor's Ratings Agency.

First of all, why do any of the ratings agencies--S&P, Moody's, Fitch--get any "credit" (don't pardon the pun) at all after the subprime debacle. Get rid of these losers for new ratings agencies that have no water under the bridge--no history of getting paid off for giving mortgage securities better ratings than they deserved. How is it that any respectable rating agency does not cut the U.S. debt rating with cuts below $4 trillion? Again, a political game played for the future of the United States of America.

Alas, a watered-down budget cut will keep the U.S. rating at its solid AAA because nobody is going to cut the U.S. debt rating until it's clear that the U.S. cannot repay its debt--somewhere between the bombing of Beijing and some small town in Kansas.

By the way, Japan holds the second largest amount of U.S. debt next to China. Don't you think they can use the money after more tsunamis and quakes than in the film '2012'?

So, the summer of 2011 ends with Greece on the verge of default, Congress taking a nice long vacation without a budget cut decision yet and the debt ceiling increased. Woo-hoo! That's the Congressional version of success. If I was that successful in my lifetime, I'd be lying on a street corner in the middle of winter asking for a dime because I'd think it was worth more than a quarter. Do I sound angry? You bet.

But who isn't angry at Washington, D.C. these days? They look like complete imbeciles--more so than usual. But, wait until Greece actually defaults, Portugal goes down, Italy falls and Germany and France are left holding the bag. Wait until residential housing pulls down the country further and we find that some of these commercial real estate trophy properties are losing value.

Wait until we realize consumers have no interest in spending for the holiday season. Then, wait until the value of the dollar continues its free-fall into October.

Then, we'll see Quantitative Easing 3 to whatever...or maybe we'll finally realize Wall Street addicts are controlling this game all along with their gambling addiction. The pusher-man, Ben Bernanke, the ultimate enabler, continues to feed their addiction until they--along with the U.S.--eventually crash.

Then we realize, our money is worth nothing. Perhaps we'll avoid that disaster in favor of a good-old fashion stock market crash from Wall Street bubbles.

I'll take the devil I know over the devil I don't know if we're going to keep on playing silly games.

Also, thinking of crashes, I'd like to take a moment to thank all of my readers who sent cards and letters wishing me the best in my recovery from sobriety. I'm happy to say I'm back up to a quart of bourbon a day as well as a toke or two of my favorite substance.

Thank you for your thoughts and prayers.

All the best,

Robert Michaels

A Morality Play

In Heaven...

Benjamin Franklin: I say, Tom. Isn't it remarkable how that Republican Party holds the debt ceiling hostage for the sake of abundantly wealthy aristocrats like we used to be on Earth

Thomas Jefferson: Speak for yourself, Benjamin. Those bloody 'Tea Partiers' have no clue what they're doing and the rest of the Republicans try to placate them. We didn't want to pay taxes without representation. These cheap bastards don't want to pay taxes at all.

BF: Yes, well, I suppose you have a point there. But the rich are paying more than their share of taxes, aren't they?

TJ: Not really, Ben. The high-power corporations high large law firms that find loopholes in the tax code and actually pay very little in taxes. They are also more astute at finding deductions for their own personal taxes. Once again, high-powered accountants can find tax loopholes.

BF: Well said, Tom, as always. But why are they holding the bloody debt ceiling vote hostage? Don't they realize interest rates will rise sky high, destroying the economy?

TJ: Perhaps. But there are two sides to this argument. If interest rates run sky high, the U.S. may never be able to pay its debt. However, prices on everything from housing to commercial real estate could drop precipitously. That means investors with some cash or savings could purchase something cheap at high rates and later refinance when rates lower. It might be better for the consumer. For banks, however, it will not be good and lending would completely freeze up, more than it is now.

BF: I see. So, even if prices were low, banks don't get their low percentage money they've become addicted to from that pusher man--Ben Bernanke.

TJ: Well, you know Ben, we never said anything about the Federal Reserve in our Constitution. And I never thought of anything so stupid as an organization within Washington, D.C. that prints money and answers to Wall Street when I wrote the Declaration of Independence.

BF: Fools. Bureaucratic fools.

TJ: That's from Raiders of the Lost Ark. Just saw it on Blu-Ray.

Enter John Hancock.

TJ: Hancock. You seem well today.

John Hancock: Not in the least, Jefferson. I get the feeling that the U.S. will not raise the debt ceiling because those TP Republicans can't get themselves together and admit they were wrong for holding the debt ceiling hostage during budget talks.

BF: They'll never be able to repay China anyway. So what's the point?

TJ: When it becomes official...when U.S. ratings lower from AAA status...interest rates on the debt increase and China can officially say they want their money back.

JH: But China needs the U.S. as much as the U.S. needs China's investment...and investment from other foreign countries.

TJ: The problem is that the pusher man--Ben Bernanke--won't be able to print up any more money to funnel to large banks to make them look solvent. Therefore, even the large businesses will need to layoff people. More unemployment, fewer consumers spend, nothing for China to import to the U.S. and, yet, the U.S. can import food, coal and other commodities to China.

BF: If I were China, I'd ask for my money back. Or start a war to get it back.

JH: War...with Europe insolvent and the U.S. insolvent....and China wanting the money they loaned to the U.S., wouldn't the U.S. be on the wrong side of that war?

BF: Maybe the U.S. will blame it on Al Qaeda or some Chinese terrorist group.

TJ: Let's not jump the gun.

JH: I love that phrase. Reminds me of the old Revolutionary War--Shot Heard 'Round the World--days of yesteryear.

TJ: Not that Sarah Palin would know a damn thing about it. But that's for another day. Let's hope cooler heads prevail on this and they can raise the debt ceiling, try to balance the budget and let the stock market crash in the normal way with a major bubbles.

BF: I do say I am looking forward to speaking to Larry Summers one day about how he masterminded this method of derivatives and structured investment vehicles, what do they call it? Financial engineering? To make people feel wealthy and prosperous when in reality they are only wealthy on paper and lose it when the bubble pops. It's sheer genius.

JH: He certainly knew how to run a good scam.

BF: And, he realized, unlike others, that women were not good at math or science. He had the balls to say it as Harvard's president.

JH: He is quite a genius. And, borrowing money--basically printing it--while keeping interest rates abnormally low does make one feel healthy, wealthy and wise...right Ben.

BF: Indeed it does.

TJ: Will you fools quit acting like the aristocratic baboons you actually are. It's exactly this type of borrowing that has led to the crisis the U.S. and Europe are in right now. No entity can borrow and borrow without eventually paying the piper. And, as for speaking to Larry Summers, I don't think he's coming up here...if you know what I mean.

BF: The poor bastard.

JH: Fat bastard.

BF: What's that?

JH: I'm going to open up some Fat Bastard. That sort of information disturbs me and I could use a glass of wine. And what more appropriate wine than Fat Bastard.

TJ: Let me see if I can speak the boss about the country we invented...and the world itself...not blowing itself up from a World War III. Know what I mean?

BF: Not sure if I do, Thomas?

TJ: That's because you still suffer from major electroshock therapy. Let me spell it out. When nobody has any money and a country heading toward a recession wants money they're owed, that country will get very angry. Then, the country that owes money...and other countries without money, will get very angry. Soon, the result is inevitable. War. Nobody wants it, but we may have it.

BF: Strange how humans often obtain things they do not want.

JH: This is no time for Star Trek lines. Tom, if there's a chance to save Earth you have to take it.

TJ: Okay, I'll just be stepping out of The Twilight Zone here and get a meeting together with the big guy. We'll need cooler heads prevailing in more than just a debt ceiling crisis. But will they?

BF: Thank you for this talk, Tom. You really cleared my head...about the country and the shape of things to come.

TJ: Well if I had your outlook, my feelings would be numb. I'd always think that everything was so fine...Everything was fine, fine, fine.

JH: Please quit quoting the Chicago "Dialogue: Part I" song. You, Tom, of all people, quoting someone else's work is particularly surprising.

TJ: These are desperate times, Hancock. I suggest you 'sign on' to our appeal for a safe landing to the debt ceiling crisis and a healthy financial system down the road.

JH: I'll drink to that.

TJ, BF and JH: We can make it happen, we can make it happen, yeah...we can make it happen, we can make happen, yeah, we can make it happen, we can make it hap--

THE END

In honor of the National Football League acting like adults and ending the lockout for everyone's best interest, here are my All-Time Great Washington Redskins list--in no particular order. As for those Republican babies in Congress holding the debt ceiling hostage, good luck getting reelected.

My Personal List of All-Time Great Washington Redskins:

1. Sonny Jurgensen
2. Charley Taylor
3. Larry Brown
4. John Riggins
5. Joe Theismann
6. Art Monk
7. Rick ‘Doc’ Walker
8. Bobby Mitchell
9. Darrell Green
10. Russ Grimm
11. Slingin’ Sammy Baugh
12. Ricky Sanders
13. Chris Hanburger
14. Diron Talbert
15. Ron McDole
16. Tim Johnson
17. Eric Williams
18. Dexter Manley
19. Charles Mann
20. Joe Jacoby
21. R.C. Thielemann
22. Bill Brundidge
23. Len Hauss
24. Jeff Bostic
25. Mark Moseley
26. Ken Houston
27. Sam Huff
28. Bobby Beathard (Hon.)
29. Joe Gibbs (Hon.)
30. Frank Herzog (Hon.)
31. Jack Kent Cooke (Hon.)
32. Brig Owens
33. ‘Speedy’ Duncan
34. Mike Nelms
35. Doug Williams (’87 season)
36. Mark Rypien (’91 season)
37. Billy Kilmer
38. Don Warren
39. Buddy Hardeman
40. Tony Green
41. Wilbur Marshall
42. Ken Harvey
43. Timmy Smith
44. Mike Bass
45. Clint Didier
46. Vince Lombardi (Hon.)
47. Ray Flaherty (Hon.)
48. London Fletcher
49. Gregg Williams
50. Jim Lachey
51. Monte Coleman
52. Matt Millen
53. Neal Olkewicz
54. Harold McLinton
55. Frank Grant
56. Mike Thomas
57. Chris Lohmiller
58. Brad Dusek
59. Dave Butz
60. Tony Peters
61. Mike Bragg
62. Brian Mitchell
63. Manny Sistrunk
64. Jack Pardee
65. Jeris White
66. Alvin Garrett
67. Charlie Brown
68. Eric Byner
69. Lemar Parrish
70. Joe Lavender
71. Verlon Biggs
72. Chris Cooley
73. Nick Giaquinto
74. Jerry Smith
75. Larry Smith
76. Roy Jefferson
77. Gerald Riggs
78. Ricky Thompson
79. John McDaniel
80. Clinton Portis
81. Santana Moss
82. Sean Taylor
83. George Allen (Hon.)
84. Gary Clark
85. Darryl Grant
86. LeVar Arrington
87. Chris Samuels
88. Danny Buggs
89. Gregg Williams
90. Mark Murphy
91. Barry Williams
92. Rich Milot
93. Jumpy Geathers
94. Randy Jones
95. Tre Johnson
96. Ricky Williams
97. Fred Dean
98. Fred Stokes
99. Ryan Clark
100. Antonio Pierce

Enjoy the 2011 NFL Season!

Our Profit Prophet Has Arrived

Friends,

I have returned from the depth of a personal hell, exorcising my inner demons in a small cave near Colombia and I return to you with a spiritual message--there is a Higher Power. I know, I felt it there as I spoke with the natives and broke bread with them. It was then I realized that this higher power would never let us all go completely bankrupt.

In fact, Financial Armageddon is upon us. And, it is peaceful. We won't feel it. It will be like Robert Redford in the "The Twilight Zone" when he played Mr. Death and touched the old lady's hand and she was dead but didn't even realize it.

Yes, it will not be easy but as we speak, a Profit Prophet has been sent to us and he--yes ladies, it is a he--will deliver us out from this evil economic crash brought on in the last 30 years with the idea that "Trickle-Down Economics" was somehow prosperous. Well, it was for about 30 years--for educated people from decent homes who were able to afford a decent education.

But now, we see the credit card tapped out. The money never trickled. The booms-and-busts were brought on by Republican presidents and, unfortunately, Democratic presidents as well.

But, we have hit the ceiling (get it). And now, the Republicans act like children painting themselves into a corner. The older children (hint--Democrats) are trying to play it tough but will they break when the Dow starts falling as it is today? Will they say they will go with the plan to give Obama the ability to raise the debt ceiling and move further with their silly games?

Okay. Seriously. Here we are. There's no turning back--only forward. Lives have been lost, families are out on the street, which has Carmageddon written all over them. It's no longer funny when men, women and children lead poverty stricken lives and we pretend not to see them with the hopes that we can get through five or10 more prosperous years. The same path of "Trickle-Down" politics will simply doom this country. That's a fact. The change is now.

As a journalist, I see now the machinations behind this change. It will not come fast and the market may even drop further before it does, but a plan is moving in place as we speak to correct the problem in the economy. Trust your higher power that this is taking place.

In Washington, D.C., the sun is shining today with a new hope for a revival toward economic prosperity. Trust me, trust your brothers and sisters around you that the times will get better and there will be a much more satisfying and prosperous socio-economic world. We look for a road to neighborhoods where all neighbors unite for their communities; we look for a world where prejudice no longer exists and man is helping man.

And, by the way, I'm not talking about hands, touching hands, singing kumbaya and selling Coca-Cola as we saw in that cheesy 1970s commercial. I'm talking about connecting with others, face-to-face and communicating our ideas through each other. We do it now through social media--let's do it in the real world--for as long as we have it left.

If I sound like a preacher on his soapbox, I am, because I've found my higher power. Have you?